Wednesday, September 7, 2011

I have cactus fertilizer in my pants. Don't ask.

I also sold my tv so now I can afford to buy medicine for my dog and shampoo for myself. Yay! Not that I expect to get a job interview soon, but I do suspect the chances of landing a job are greater if I don't look like a pile of driftwood. Which is what I do when I don't wash my hair, since I haven't had a haircut since March. That shit is expensive here.

So, I've decided that if I don't get a job by winter, I'm moving abroad for a year instead. The alternative is living under a bridge and I'm just not too interested in doing that in a country as cold as this one.

23 comments:

Mark said...

Good luck getting a job. You don't really need a TV when you have the internet lol. At least not as a TV.

StigmataHandjob said...

Yeah, I don't watch tv anyway so I don't really care THAT much. The problem is all the passionate lovemaking with my PS3 that I miss out on. LA Noire was so addictive too.

Kid Shuffle said...

Where would you want to live abroad?

Generally Disgruntled said...

Living abroad for a year sounds like a cool plan. I happen to not have a job or much money, how does one accomplish this that way? Does it involve registering as a refugee? Or seeking political asylum? Because I have contemplated both

escapist said...

Not having a TV isn't such a big deal but the situation itself is pretty shitty; so good luck finding a job. I'm afraid that in a few years I'll end up under a bridge too, so we could like share it. As long as it's not in your cold country.

StigmataHandjob said...

Kid Shuffle: I'm gonna do a working holiday-thing which means I have three options, Canada, New Zealand and Australia. I've lived in Canada before and loved it, but I'm mainly considering NZ for now.

Generally Disgruntled: I'm gonna sell whatever I can to scrape up enough for a plane ticket and whatever they require to let me in the country. Doing a working holiday-thing is supposedly pretty easy paperwork-wise.

escapist: I am all for sharing my bridge with you, you'e fucking awesome.

That Bastard From Bellingham said...

Pffft, television is overrated. Horribly so.

Besides, it's also a distraction, y'knowwhatImean? Hell, a panopticonic one at that.

Admittedly, if yer a console vidyuh playa then yeah that shit can seriously cut into yer gametime, y'know?

But hey, there's plenty of free flash (coughcoughCASUALcoughcough) games out there to play on yer 'puter, y'knowwhatImean? You don't even need a good graphics card for 'em, just a browser.

The Dawg said...

You could always stop cleaning yourself completely, go live under a bridge and pose as a troll, then demand a cut from all the money made from German tourists who want to get a look at a "genuine Swedish troll."
Could work... maybe...

Shockgrubz said...

I've not got my hair cut, either. We could be long hair models. You know, the kind they put up in condos on the beach. Great times will be had, and money!

Hasidic Plumber said...

The fertilizer should help your chances, i guess.
If everything else fails, contact me for a pipe fixing gig, perhaps a little gigolo action. My pipe can't handle the massive amount of ladies hurtin for a squirtin, you know. Plumbers are sex icons, join the club. It's like the navy, but not gay.

Jay said...

if you don't want us to ask, don't tell. ;)

Rob said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Rob said...

Christ man, good luck. Hope your situation changes for the better.

Astaroth said...

the cactus thing sounds like a good story. but I only watch TV online anyways.
still, good luck finding a job. and bridges suck, but there's better places to hide out form the elements. stairs of university buildings for example.

Generally Disgruntled said...

In that case, I'd say come to America, but it sure as fuck isn't easy to find work here. And as far as nice weather, that's the south. And no one wants to be in the Southern USA

Devour said...

Damn sorry to hear this, but there has to be someone out there that hires! Good luck man!

Shaw said...

Living under a bridge can be more fun than you think!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arakawa_Under_the_Bridge

DWei said...

Hope you have a better chance of getting a job than I did.

cheshire said...

The only thing I would notice about me not having a TV is the empty spot where I would normally see it as I walked past it. I wish you well in your job finding missions, but the year abroad thing doesn't sound too bad either. I wanna do the same thing next year.

Jessica Thompson said...

Dude that sounds painful. Good luck!
Come check me out =) alphabetalife.blogspot.com

Scrubby Bear said...

Sounds like fun to live abroad.. without a tv! Godspeed on the job hunt. In this economy, you will need it.

blorriepoes said...

stigmating :D

A Lunatic Pope said...

good luck finding a job. Personally, I try my hardest to never work. It's part of being a Pope I guess. Hopefully soon I can live completely tax free like all good religions. Also, you do need a tv. Have you not seen Videodrome? If you don't get your daily dose of cathoid rays you could go crazy.