Wednesday, August 24, 2011

I went to the dentist the other day. He was so impressed with my teeth that he wanted them for himself. So he pulled out my teeth and then his own, and inserted his teeth into my mouth and my teeth into his. It was very distressing and I was really upset to be stuck with someone elses teeth. Especially since they were too big for my mouth.

Luckily I woke up a few minutes later. I don't generally look forward to seeing my dentist, but I'm even less inclined to cheer when I have to see him now. Hopefully this is one dream that won't come true.

When I haven't been dreaming I've been spending a lot of time here:


and here:



and with these guys:


and, always, with her:



I'm considering writing an actual serious and personal post one of these days. Maybe I'll get my butt out of my ass and do it if I get bored enough with skipping around on the beach.

Monday, August 15, 2011

You gotta ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well do ya, punk? I do. Same day I completely ran out of money I got a tax return that'll keep me afloat for another couple of weeks. I really, really need a job now. I'm considering roaming the streets, beating people up for money. Chances are they don't have any money either though. Life should be more like a vidya in that sense. Killing rats to take their cash would totally work well for me.

Being more or less unemployed also turns me into a complete hermit. I don't have any friends in this town and my family is batshit insane so I'd rather avoid them. Actually a lot of my time is spent actively avoiding said family, after I had to file a restraining order for my dad and aunt, so I can't spend as much time outdoors as I'd like to in case they're around. And it's a small place, so there's a pretty big chance of running into them if I'm not careful.

So yeah, I stay inside a lot and I'm alone a lot. If I didn't have Oscar and my dog I'd be going completely nuts. Speaking of nuts we spent an entire night discussing which super heroes we believe shave their balls. Tony Stark is a giveaway, I wouldn't be surprised if Dick Grayson does too. Cyclops probably does. What do you guys think?

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Why, oh why, can idiots not get their own fucking planet and leave mine alone?

This, fucking this.


On the other hand, this is awesome and spot on.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

I know, I've been increasingly sucky at writing (not to mention reading) blog entries. I've been having massive trouble with my whore of a laptop. I'm also trying to squeeze the last few drops out of summer before it's all gone, and that is something best done offline, so you're probably gonna have to put up with my semi-absence a bit longer.

Spent most of my weekend sitting outside reading Watchmen, which is such a fucking fantastic piece of grim awesomeness that if you haven't read it already, I will personally come over and flick your teeth over and over until you do. Or, well, I would, but I got brownies in the oven so you'll just have to imagine me doing it. Or maybe I'll outsource that specific task and you can flick your own teeth until you've read Watchmen, and I'll give you a brownie for the trouble.

While you're at it, you should play Limbo (it's on PSN or Steam), which is an itty bitty platform/puzzle game. It only takes an evening to finish and it's pretty easy, but it's incredibly atmospheric and eerie and brilliant and deserves your immediate affection.


EDIT:
I just noticed that someone has been diligently googling to find out who I am.


Whoever you are, you've found my boyfriend, and considering I use this nickname for virtually everything, you've probably also figured out my name and where I live by now. Not that I know why anyone would want that, but each to his own.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

No I'm not dead, I've just been really busy. And then sick. And then really busy again.

Last night I dreamt that I was out driving a motorboat on a river, in the dark and the rain. Suddenly the boat lurched as a man emerged from the water and pulled himself into it. It turned out to be Johnny Depp. "Please", he panted, "you have to help me remember the lyrics to this Barry White song I've had in my head all day. I can hum it but I cant sing it and it's driving me mad. Please, help me". He sat down on my lap and told me to admire his boots. They were black and made from rubber. I told him they were nice and he nodded. We then spent about fifteen minutes trying to work out the Barry White lyrics he needed. Not sure how, I don't know a single song of his, but it was a dream so I suppose it doesn't have to make sense. When we were done Johnny Depp thanked me and asked me what the score was. I told him I had no idea what he was talking about. "Right, well I'll be on my way then" he said, patted me on the back and lunged himself out of the boat, into the river.

And then I woke up. And as always, I was disappointed at how much awake-reality sucks in comparisation to sleep-reality.