Monday, June 13, 2011

Had a couple of crazy busy days, which is exactly how I like it. Lots of working and a wee bit of partying this weekend kept me off the computer for a while. It's been really nice. Oscar and I went to his cousin's graduation party on friday, saturday I got New Shoes of Awesome (my old ones consist more of holes than shoes, they've been held together by tape the past few months), and Oscar took me out for lunch. We proceeded to hang out with the coolest infant in the world (she's like two years old and a fullfledged gamer) and her family, whilst eating barbecue and drinking beer. Had to go home much to early on saturday night cause I had to work again yesterday.

Now that I'm practically done with school (I have some minor changes to make in one thesis before turning in the final version) and have about a month left of work, I guess I have to start thinking about the future for real. This far I'm down to a few different paths I could take.

1. Get a job in Sweden doing societal security-stuff. It's really well paid but pretty boring, and it would require me staying here, which I don't want.

2. Do a working holiday-thing for a year. I could go to Australia, New Zealand or Canada. Definately considering this.

3. Migrate for real. Also considering this.

4. Be unemployed and kill myself because I can't afford to live. Not really considering this.

The issue, a pretty vital one for me, is that if I stay I get to keep Oscar and my dog (which, obviously, I want very much) but I'll have to stay in Sweden, which is not a particularly desireable option. And if I go, I'll get to do the things I want to do (which is be free, explore, grow as a person, gain awesome experiences, have friends, etc), but I'll lose the only ones I have left to love, the ones who have kept me sane the past year and a half. Oscar is the first and only human being who has ever made me feel like a real person. I don't know how I could give that up. But I can't give up myself either. Not again.

I have to get a driver's license and save up before I can move abroad in any case, so I still have six months or so to think about it (providing I can even get a job to save up in the first place). But whichever happens, part of me is going to be very unhappy.

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