Thursday, November 13, 2008

Le panic

So. I'm trying to study personality psychology while my own personality is crumbling. Trying to cope with the fact that I have to go home soon. Back to the Twilight Zone. I write two or three sentences about defense mechanisms, get an idea about a scholarship that might allow me to come back here within two years, and spend the next three hours looking for it. I'm way past my personal deadline (but still well within the limits of the actual deadline, cause since I'm neurotic and have insane expectations on myself I always set out to do things in half the time I have avaliable to me) and I can't think. I can't focus. Even if I had a bat with a huge flapping vagina in front of my face I wouldn't be able to give it my full attention. The only thing on my mind is how to get back here. Not good, not healthy, and especially not in line with my be-like-water-philosophy.

Anyone reading this who actually managed to get a job abroad and migrate? At this point I'd serve you my left eyelid on a whole grain sandwich for ideas. Well not really, but you get the point.

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